The Pendulum of Life – The Beginning Of My ‘Writing Story’

 

 

I was searching for a new topic for my post and suddenly had an epiphany that why don’t I take you through my writing journey. The beginning of my ‘writing story?’. I call it just the beginning because there are more chapters to it. Each new chapter unfolds with it many new stories.

Every writer’s journey is unique. It is a story to be told. I never began as a writer. Never in my life did I know that writing would become a quintessential part of my life, without which it is hard to imagine my onward voyage. And one day I would be penning down something like this.

So how should I begin my writing story?

 

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Going back in time 

 

I guess this would be the easy-breezy to begin with. Okay, so if I go back in time, I sow the seeds of writing at the age of 11. Age where you start gaining a bit of sense. Not a lot but still enough to play with the words. Also, the environment where you grow up, your family, friends and peers start sculpting your thoughts. Same is the case with me. So the first poem which I penned down was about ‘memories’ which play a dominant part in our lives. The good ones make our hearts ache a little considering that we are never getting them back whereas the odd ones make us laugh. The wordings of that poem go like “Kuch Yadein yaad ati hain…Yaad aake rulati hain…” and is extremely close to my heart; obviously the credit goes to it being the first one in my writing journey. 

From there the journey began and by divine grace it is continuing still. I feel elated when I write. I feel closer to myself when I scribble. I can create a special connection with me when I pen down my thoughts. It’s like, by writing I build a special relationship with my soul. Everyday is a new day and not even a single moment passes without learning.

Somehow I feel that my destiny has delineated my life for me in such a way that every day brings with it a new story. It brings me incredible stories. It has helped me weave my thoughts in a better way. I think in life if I haven’t been through few of the worst phases of my life, I would have never been able to find the exact words for the paper; and same is the case with the happiest moments of my life too. Writing story of few of the important turning points which marked the beginning and re-beginning of my dreams somehow makes me feel happier. 

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Papa, Exam and The Song 

 

I remember one fine incident from my school days. It was my final board exam and I finished the paper 30 minutes prior to the actual time out. I don’t remember now that whether the anxiousness of not getting few of the answers right or the overwhelmingness of being it the last exam of the schedule brought to me the wordings of one of the songs which I penned down on the backside of my question paper. Now there was a tradition in our family of showing the exam papers to our father after each exam (something which me and my siblings had followed throughout), so that he can total out the marks months before the actual results were out (traumatic, isn’t it?) When he turned over the paper, he read the song and recited the wordings of the song (needless to mention that it embarrassed me enough), and he, while trying to hide the visible concern on his face, asked me whether I was able to complete the whole paper, to which I nodded . That was the first time when he got to know that I am actually serious about writing and all he did was to sit down with me during my vacations to hear my songs out. That was an extremely proud moment for me to recite my songs to my father, taking his corrections and molding the tune and lyrics in a better way. Seriously, parents are forever. Their appreciation and blessings take you higher and higher in life. And no one, absolutely no one can understand you better than them. 

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Probing my identity 

 

So like this I moved forward on my writing path which was full of twists and turns, highs and lows, joys and sorrows. Then there were those difficult years of my life when I got blank, couldn’t figure out anything. Certainly because of the losses which felt like disasters. Those changes lead to changing my path. Once you change your path, getting onto it again seems to be difficult. You feel disoriented, aimless and worthless. Amidst weaving new dreams for replenishing the ones which were broken, trying to be true to my responsibilities and figuring out my identity, juggling between my job and the actual ambition, somewhere I was lost. Somehow words stopped knocking the doors of my heart and mind. The words which once seemed to flow like the stream through my mind got trapped in a bog of crowd which surrounded me. 

Sometimes you are in search of that motivation which reminds you of your existence. Maybe you find yourself trapped in the unmotivated world and lose interest in almost everything. Slowly and gradually you start forgetting about your true personality. You confine yourself to the boundaries which others have set for you. You forget that you were born to be free. Your thoughts are to be set free and not bounded by any sort of law and order. You are not meant to follow the rules which have been set for you, instead you were made to design your own rules, shape your own path. You will be lost if not found by your own true self. 

You need to be touched upon by the breeze of your own beauty of your thoughts which introduce you to your true self.

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Rebooting my system 

 

I read through the old pieces of my writings. Sometimes you don’t believe that you have written that special piece of writing that is bringing a beautiful smile to your lips. You feel joyous by the fact that you are actually the one behind the pen. And that is what happened with me. I resumed the journey which I left somewhere in the middle. I started by scribbling down the random pieces and then I guess I fell in love with my thoughts again and vice versa. May be there was the return of the aroma of the good old memories which were diminishing slowly in thin air or the return of the people who made me realize that it is what I am made for. So the point here is, in life there is always a need of the people who love you, memories which are worthy enough and your internal spark which needs to be ignited in order to bring about the liveliness in you again.

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Walk the path of internal happiness 

 

I assume all of us need to choose our path first and then walk it. Something that is needed to fill the voids in our lives. We are all made for something or the other. We just need to give it our all so as to traverse what was once left unexplored. Even after settling down with everything that is needed to live a stable life, you need to realize the actual purpose you were born for. Whether there still is something missing. Whether there is a void to fill in. You have to take care of your internal happiness which in the fullness of time you will have to discern yourself by following your dreams, your actual interest, something that you love and something which you see yourself doing for the rest of your life.

Wake up. Take a deep breath. Take the plunge and lighten up your internal happiness.

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I hope my ‘writing story’ must have become successful in taking into self-realization that your internal happiness is important and needs to be realized.

This is my writing story. What’s yours?

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Stay tuned for my next blog to know more on my writing story : How Pendulum of Life happened. 🙂

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Author

Garima Dixit


 

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